We’ve been blessed with a spectacular draw.
The UEFA Champions League is the world’s premier soccer competition, but if we’re being honest with ourselves, it rarely gets really, truly good until the quarterfinals. This season looks likely to be an exception, with the gods of the draw treating us to just about the best Round of 16 we could have possibly hoped for.
Manchester City, one of the favorites, has been drawn against the competition’s worst remaining team. The remaining hipster favorites/dark horses have drawn each other. That leaves us with a bunch of GLAMOUR TIES, the likes of which are usually reserved for later stages. We’re so lucky.
In an ideal world, we’d watch all of these matches. None of them are bad. But unfortunately, we live in a world where two games are always on simultaneously, and at a time when lots of people are at work or school, so sneak-watching just one game is already a tough task. With that in mind, here’s how we suggest you prioritize your viewing.
8. Manchester City vs. Schalke 04
When: Wednesday, February 20 and Tuesday, March 12
Hey, good for Schalke! They managed to sneak through their group in a season following the losses of Leon Goretzka and Max Meyer, who they’re finding extremely difficult to replace. They get to retain their reputation and make a bit of money. And now they’ll lose very comfortably to Manchester City, who will probably get to play a rotated side in the second leg and rest some players for a close domestic title race.
7. AS Roma vs. FC Porto
When: Tuesday, February 12 and Wednesday, March 6
Neither of these teams will be winning the Champions League this season, but watching Roma’s Cengiz Under and Justin Kluivert in Europe is always worth your time. If you don’t know those guys now, you’ll be familiar with them very soon.
6. Olympique Lyonnais vs. FC Barcelona
When: Tuesday, February 19 and Wednesday, March 13
And here’s where we get to the good stuff. Lyon will be big underdogs against Barcelona, but they took four points off Manchester City and they have the most exciting young core of any team in the world. Memphis Depay, Nabil Fekir and Moussa Dembélé are well-known around the world, but midfielder Tanguy Ndombele could be headed for the biggest future of the group. This matchup against Barcelona might even amount to a job interview.
Unfortunately for Lyon, Lionel Messi is in the midst of one of the best seasons of his career. He has more goals and assists than anyone else in Europe’s top five leagues. He’s still dribbling by defenders more often than anyone else in the world despite allegedly slowing down. He’ll have fun teaching these kids a lesson.
5. Manchester United vs. Paris Saint-Germain
When: Tuesday, February 12 and Wednesday, March 6
In normal years, this would be No. 2 or 1. It certainly has the marquee names. But Manchester United is an objectively bad team right now. The 36 shots they allowed to Liverpool on Sunday is the most any team in the Premier League has allowed this season. They’ve conceded more goals this season than all of last season. Their Premier League goal differential sits at an even 0. It will not just be deflating, but truly embarrassing, if PSG’s forward trio of Neymar, Kylian Mbappe and Edinson Cavani doesn’t run circles around the Red Devils.
4. Atlético Madrid vs. Juventus
When: Wednesday, February 20 and Tuesday, March 12
On paper, this one is full of thrilling narrative. Atlético Madrid, embarrassed by Cristiano Ronaldo in Champions League on several occasions, has a chance to finally get one over on their nemesis. And conversely, Ronaldo has to go through his old rivals if he’s going to guide Juventus to a Champions League title, which is what they’re paying him tens of millions of Euros to do.
On the pitch, it’s likely to be a complete slog. Both managers will be focused on defense and hoping the other team makes a mistake. Neither team makes many mistakes. A pair of 0-0 draws or 1-0 home wins that leads into extra time — with minimal scoring chances — would not surprise anyone.
This is one for the tactics nerds and not a match to show your casual soccer fan friends who you’re trying to get into the game.
3. Real Madrid vs. Ajax
When: Wednesday, February 13 and Tuesday, March 5
The three-time defending European Champions should, generally, not have much trouble defeating anyone from the Eredivisie. But Real Madrid are struggling in their post-Ronaldo existence, and this is the best Ajax team in 20 years.
Two Ajax stars in particular — Matthias De Ligt and Frenkie De Jong — will be getting their first of many chances to shine in the global spotlight. De Ligt is the first defender to ever win the European Golden Boy, while De Jong is one of the most unique and versatile players on the planet. It seems inevitable that both will move on to huge clubs (perhaps Madrid or Barcelona) this summer. There’s little question that they’re superstars of the future, but this matchup gives them a chance to show that they’re superstars right now.
2. Tottenham Hotspur vs. Borussia Dortmund
When: Wednesday, February 13 and Tuesday, March 5
Maybe it’s wrong to rank this tie ahead of ones involving teams that have a good chance to actually win the competition. There’s not much reason to predict either of these teams can make the final. But of all the Round of 16 matchups, this is the one most likely to feature pure entertainment. Both teams are going to press aggressively and play to score goals, so both teams’ athletic attackers are going to have space to play in. It’s going to be a blast.
But it’s also the store brand version of...
1. Liverpool vs. Bayern Munich
When: Tuesday, February 19 and Wednesday, March 13
Holy crap! This should be the semifinal or final, not a Round of 16 matchup. But thanks to Liverpool’s slip-ups against PSG and Red Star Belgrade, we get it a couple of rounds early.
Between their run to last year’s final and their undefeated start to the Premier League season, Liverpool will be slight favorites in this one. Bayern Munich has been far from dominant this season, and is in the process of figuring out who will lead them in a post-Robbery world. But Arjen Robben and Franck Ribery haven’t retired yet, and they still take over games on occasion.
It’s tough to envision an aging Bayern Munich keeping pace with Liverpool, but they gave Real Madrid a better run for their money last season than anyone expected. And hey, if Red Star can pull it off, there’s no reason to count out Bayern.